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December 25 - It's CHRISTMAS. Deal with it.  And yes, I know I'm posting this a day early. The staff of FJ.com is taking Christmas Day off, but we didn't want to shortchange any readers who might pop in. I also hope that the new year brings some degree of common sense to those who get their panties in a bunch over the word "Christmas", and insist on changing tradition under the guise of promoting diversity in children. I'm all for public displays of ALL holidays. Stop with the PC crap and focus instead on what's important - celebrating heritage, tradition, religion, history, and/or family - that's what holidays are really about. They're invitations, not exclusions. You don't have to be a Jesus Krispie to enjoy Christmas. I'm not Mexican, and I love Cinco de Mayo. American holidays are so commercialized these days, their true origins are completely lost. Besides, if every historical truth about our holidays were revealed, we'd probably treat them no differently than any other day. So go ahead and wish me a Swingin' Kwanzaa, or a Bitchin' Solstice. I won't be offended. And neither should you be when I say Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. |December 24 - Christmas rocks. But non-Christmas type folks, hang in there. We'll be back to blasphemy, hedonism, and assorted non-holiday fun before too long... Merry Christmas everyone! |December 23 - Has to be done. I'll also be tinkering with the forums and daily comments over the next few days. I might require registration/approval to post there in the future. We'll see. Honestly, I never wanted to do anything like that, but sadly, I think it might be necessary. If it's just a matter of signing up with a username or email address, and then waiting for "moderator" approval I'll probably do it. But I don't want to make people turn over registration info to a third party if it can be avoided. Other projects are still pending, including a revamp of the playlist for FJ Radio. There will be a few surprises, so tune in over the next few days. |December 22 - It's beginning to look a lot like... To my readers in colder climates, with latitude measurements in the double digits and temperatures struggling to reach them - take heart and remember that it's always summertime somewhere. Now make sure you don't forget to drip the faucets so your pipes don't freeze, and set your alarms a little earlier so you can give your cars time to warm up a bit before you drive across a crowded icy highway. I still don't miss winter, mon. |December 21 - Told ya...  Of course, they'll probably still screw up their draft picks next season. Either way, last night was the upset of the season, and it was a great game to watch. Unless you're a Patriots fan, that is... But you bastards are already in the playoffs, so I don't wanna hear it. The temperature is brutally cold here at Casa James - it's only supposed to get into the mid 70s today. (Did I ever mention how little I miss winter in Northern California?) If this keeps up, I'll have to wear socks... Don't know how I'll ever handle those awful days of summer, when it gets all the way into the mid 80s. Yup, the best climate corresponds to the best music - somewhere between about 77 and 89... Life ain't so bad. |December 20 - Diss-function! I'm having a hard time with this... On the one hand, why give him the press? Surely he knows he's struck a nerve, and I'll bet that the monosyllabic replies by the bottom-feeders of the heavy metal culture give him all the validation he needs. Plus, looking at his site stats, I don't think there are too many people who give a rip what he has to say. But the other half of me really wants to tear into this guy. If blatant social ignorance like his isn't confronted and given an appropriate opposing view on the terms of reason, all confrontations and reactions will be selectively chosen by the simple-minded Grim. That's not acceptable. I also believe that much like the annoying roach that he is, if we shine a light on him he'll go back to hiding in the internet's basement. It should be noted that he's obviously afraid to confront the folks with opposing viewpoints, as there is no opportunity on his site to engage him in debate. As expected, he had no response to my defense of heavy metal music. He's hiding behind a keyboard and afraid to remove his blinders. Right, wrong, or indifferent, at least I put up my name and picture behind everything I say, and leave ample opportunity for feedback. Funny enough, one of the reports he cited as a supporting piece of evidence for his completely ridiculous attack actually conflicts with his thesis and supports mine. From http://www.mediascope.org/pubs/ibriefs/yvm.htm:
Want more? I'm sure I could find plenty. After proving that music does NOT cause people to become semi-human barbarians, and that it's fans can and do lead productive lives, I should turn to the defense of the music itself. Click this link to see a fusion of heavy metal guitar with classical phrasing. By the way, the guy in the video has a degree in music theory and composition from Northeastern Illinois University. And -gasp- he played in a heavy metal band. Even worse, a heavy metal band that endorsed sobriety and rallied AGAINST drug use. The horror. For every vulgar lyric you can find, I can find musical complexity. For every brilliant piece of work from other musical genres, I can find dysfunction. Go on - try me. Once again, Mr Grim, school is OUT. |December 19 - Incompetence defined.   What's the problem now? Well, after his inspirational speech giving unparalleled support to the armed forces, uniting the country, and convincing its citizens that our troops in Iraq are well-supplied and that their numbers are adequate, if not luxurious, it seems that even Donald himself is now too overburdened to even sign condolence letters to the families of those killed in action. Maybe he's busy enacting that plan for ending the occupation and rebuilding a post-war Iraq. Or maybe he's consulting with top military brass, trying to pick the specific time to go in and catch Osama bin Laden. Or, he could be busy converting captured old insurgent hideouts to playgrounds and destroying confiscated weapon caches. I'd hate to think that he's just an incompetent dunderhead, caught yet again with his pants down on the job, so I'll go on assuming that he's been pretty busy personally helping the troops dig through Iraqi junkyards looking for scrap metal to reinforce transport trucks that should have been ready YEARS ago. I'd like to know one thing... What on Earth does it take to get fired from the Bush cabinet? How does this guy still have a job? Someone please fire him and replace him with Sen. John McCain. Or better yet, fire Rumsfeld, appoint McCain as Vice President, and put Cheney back in as Secretary of Defense. If we've got to have an evil S.O.B. in the position, I at least want it to be someone who scares people via ACTION rather than INACTION. I wouldn't even eat at a McDonald's run by Rumsfeld. |December 18 - Some people never learn. But I wasn't born yesterday. I'd like to point out a few things to the person who thinks she's being "clever" by using at least 5 different aliases (all unregistered, of course...) to comment... First, you really need to get your characters straight, especially when you try to have a dialog with yourself and pass it off as different people. Second, I have a friggin' degree in Communications (and spent semesters studying speech pathology). Did you really think that I wouldn't notice your difficulties with language, and your awkwardly forced attempts to sound like you speak English fluently? You're a piss-poor non-native speaker of English, and it shows - you will ALWAYS speak using patterns I've been trained to recognize, no matter which name you pick to spew nonsense on my daily posts. You're not smart enough to pull off a language game on me, so don't try it. Don't even bother practicing and coming back later - you're old. You're WAY past the age of learning a language fluently without giving away your native tongue. Game over. You're busted. To make it easier for you to understand - You=dumb. Dumb=you. Dumb you=not welcome around here. See, most people who post here are at this level of intelligence: _______ Monkeys are here._______ You're down here._______ Further proving that you are in fact WAY too stupid to think you can get away with posting here unnoticed... Even if language wasn't the smoking gun - everytime someone signs my guestbook, they leave behind evidence. It's called an IP address, and marks the specific computer and path used to leave behind the comment. I can trace that. Doesn't matter which nickname you use - the computer itself leaves behind a "fingerprint". Are you really gonna try to tell me that "different" people with the same difficulties with the English language using the same computer to post comments, within minutes of each other, is possible? If ODB ran this site, he'd probably say... "Nigga, please." If you'd just like to go away quietly (and I suggest you do and take all of your ri-goddamned-diculous "friends" with you), I'll grant a pass. If you insist on continually staining my comment logs and tainting my website with your unwelcomed presence, believe me, it won't go unchecked. DO NOT mess with me or any of my friends or family here. You know who you are, and you're not worth my time. You've already stolen WAY too much of it. No more. AND THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING. NOW GO AWAY AND DON'T COME BACK. |December 17 - Danielle Appreciation Day!  December 15 - Rebuttal.
Honestly though, this guy is probably harmless. I can't imagine the old PMRC even jumping onto this bandwagon, much less anyone with real cultural, intellectual, or artistic clout. |December 14 - Nice.
My rebuttal is forthcoming. I'm still pretty pissed off, and should probably clear my mind before I take this jackass to task. Although I guess I could just sink to the levels he'd expect me to reach, and just write, "Dude, go fuck yourself". Honestly, I think that pretty much sums it up. |December 13 - People are stupid, and I'm always right. But what makes me sick is the crowd reaction to cases like these. There were cheering people outside, ecstatic as the verdict was read. WHY on Earth would you feel the need to high-five your neighbor over something like this? This isn't a friggin' football game. You didn't win anything. I mean, I know the 49ers really suck this year, but are you people truly so hard up for entertainment that you need to go to the courthouse and have a friggin' tailgate party to celebrate death? You're a bunch of ghouls! Of all the places that some crazy senile driver could randomly crash into a crowd, why oh why couldn't this have been the scene of one of them? Preferably live, with Geraldo, Oprah, and Maury all reporting simultaneously. THAT, my friends, would be something worth celebrating. |December 12 - You Make The Call! Gym 1. We'll call it, um, "Platinum's Gym". They straight-up lied to me when they told me there were no other gyms in town. They were definitely very interested in getting my money, which demonstrates a commitment to helping me meet my goals, or so they say. They cost almost $700/year. There are a TON of hot chicks there though. I know I go to the bottom of the pectoral order and stand no chance in this relative environment, but it is a nice perk. Gym 2. We'll call this one "Planet Gym". I was greeted at the door by a guy who probably moonlights as a pro wrestler. Even vocally. They're a little out of the way, but I can get a membership there for under $400/year (needles extra). There's the possibility of being on the receiving end of a "swirly", but a lot of the folks who exercise there look like they couldn't even reach back to wipe their own asses much less ever catch me on SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY. Gym 3. It's a small independent less than 2 miles from my house. I can get an annual membership for $300. Plus, I can get a trial 3-month membership for $100. But they're kinda small, and I got the impression that the owners are kinda flaky, meaning "business hours" might not always correspond with the hours posted on the memo they wrote for me. They're also located next to a pizza place, which would be somewhat counterproductive to a terminal face-stuffer like me. Or there's always the possiblity of sucking it up, just spending a grand or so, and converting my garage into a home gym. It'd be economical in the long run. But unfortunately, there are no hot chicks living in my garage... |December 11 - My (un)Coolest Years! I remember sneaking a fifth of "liberated" Kahlua to the beach, stopping by Wendy's first to get a few Frosty mixers. Kahlua and Frosty - the greatest gourmet teenage drink ever. Then we leaned up against our cars (well, the cars of the ones who actually HAD cars... Mom wouldn't let me get my driver license unless I cut my hair, and my blossoming mullet was far more important than transportation) with the windows rolled down and the (taped and copied) soundtrack to "The Decline Of Western Civilization - the Metal Years" blasting. You can't really call it "background" music when it's clearly audible for 100 yards in every direction. Life was good, especially when we'd head down to the beach with our contraband and spend hours dreaming about "getting out of this town". After all, the cops didn't have jurisdiction over the beach - only the roadside. For us to get busted with our black market beverages, we'd have to get caught by the Coast Guard, who surely had their hands full with other priorities. The walls were COVERED with pages ripped out of Circus, Hit Parader, Creem, Rip, Aardschock America, Metal Edge, Metal Maniacs, Guitar World, Rockline, and whatever else had a picture of one of my heros. Neil Zlozower was a hero-by-association. There was no room for anything else - my wall was a collage, and a tribute.Ironically, 20 years later, one of my rooms still is - only now I own the original photographs, autographed by Neil himself! Scientific calculators - the kind that could store brief text messages - were rarely used for math. We would type lyrics from Metallica songs and pass them back and forth until someone didn't know the next line. Of course, that person was then labelled a "poser", no matter how well the Judas Priest logo was drawn on his folder. I used to walk to school, and when I left, I looked like almost every other kid. But somewhere along the way, I became the "rock god" I thought I should be. For in my backpack I had the wrestling shoes, the bracelets, and about a million bandannas which were tied around my calves somewhere between Philadelphia Avenue and Indiantown Road. Little did I know that Steven Tyler was using them in his microphone stand to sneak drugs onstage - I had no idea... Classes didn't matter. It was little more than 7 hours of filler time used to pick out which tape would be played first when we got home. I also remember never understanding why people looked at me funny when I would bring KISS tapes to soccer practice, or suggest Poison songs for "class song". It didn't take long to realize that "popularity" just wasn't gonna be one my problems. Life stopped on Saturday night - whatever was happening needed to take a break because it was time for Headbanger's Ball. The loudest parties would actually become silent when it was time for a World Premiere video from Guns N Roses. REAL fans remember when Riki Rachtman replaced Adam Curry, and at first, we hated it. We knew Riki only got the job because he was friends with Axl Rose. And for the longest time, he sucked. Y'know, a lot of us even remember the 90s when he distanced himself from that whole scene, and played the "I never got to pick any of the songs I wanted to hear 'cause I was the hardcore guy" card. Of course, this was when the hardcore stuff was cool, WAY after the decline of 80s metal's popularity. I'll bet that if Jetboy would've taken off instead of Pantera things would have been a lot different... Anyhow, it was a good show to watch, and it made me realize something very important - when I was a kid, VH1 was the channel for boring adults. Perspective really sucks. |December 10 - Damageplan wrapup. Provided you're an idiot. Rock stars talk shit about each other all the time. Hell, brothers do the same thing. Friends say things they don't necessarily mean. It's called emotion, and we are all guilty of putting our collective feet in our mouths and saying things we will potentially later regret, especially if a tragic coincidence is the result. Furthermore, one of the people killed in the melee was a security guard, who was chasing this lunatic across the stage, heroically trying to protect the band and crowd. This human waste didn't sneak anything in past security, he didn't even come from the crowd. He barrelled in through a back door. There was only one person responsible for this incident, and thankfully, he got what he deserved - an instant death sentence, courtesy of a quick-thinking cop who prevented this asshole from further "glory". Now stop with the misguided outrage and celebrate the life of the victims. I'm sure that's exactly how they'd prefer us to behave - with the stereo turned up, metal horns in the air, and the sound assurance that all but one of the people who died that night is in a better place. |December 9 - Senseless. What inspires senselessness like this? Prayers and condolences to family, friends, and fans. |December 8 - All's well...  And so I can't be accused of bias, here's his sister, caught just after stalking a pine needle...  It's good to know that my house is secure. |December 7 - Now THIS is funny! Also saw a new pic of Motley Crue, which I swiped from Metal Sludge. Nikki looks good, Tommy looks good, Vince looks like he's almost there... Mick looks like he ought to be printed on currency. Check this out:  I think he may have signed the Declaration of Independence, entertained the troops during the Civil War, and experienced his first turn-of-the-century party in 1899. Holy crap, he looks unhealthy... I know he's been having health problems for many years, and just had his hip replaced... I hope he's ok for this whole reunion tour. But just in case he isn't...  Why not? Everybody goes to see Nikki, Tommy, and Vince anyways... I could play the songs and stay in the background just fine. |December 6 - Another Shameless FJ Radio plug! Well, I'm not doing this to "beat" anyone. And there's a reason I'm only playing one or two songs from each cd I pick - so you get a sample, and the option to pick up the cds you like by clicking on the "buy" button, supporting the artists and the station. Honestly, you'd have to listen for months to hear every song on a given cd. Also, a lot of the stuff I play is old and out of print, but still worthy of being shared. This is strictly a labor of love - I'm doing it because I love this music. And if you're visiting here, there's a pretty good chance you'll like it too. The service is totally free - you can click the banner and listen 24/7/365. But if you want to listen ad-free, you can subscribe to the service. That'll turn it all off. Or, if you just want to pitch in under the table and keep it between you and me, I've enabled that to be a possibility as well... Again, I'm not doing this to scam anyone, but it does cost money to keep the station on the air. Any contributions/kickbacks from selling cds/subscriptions will go towards running and improving the station. The more that gets taken in, the longer and more extensive the playlist can become. Hell, if enough people donate/subscribe, I'll buy the ad-free package. What am I saying? Listen to FJ Radio, and know that what's most important is keeping the music alive, and I fully intend to do that. You'll help tremendously if you just tune in, listen, and give me a good rating. (Making me your favorite internet station doesn't hurt either...) Oh yeah... I added Sweet F.A., Cats In Boots, Dirty Blonde, Femme Fatale, Sedona, and Jizzy Pearl to the playlist this week. Never heard of 'em? Don't worry - there's still lots of more familiar stuff in the mix. |December 5 - Breaking news! I surf the internet so you don't have to.  Swiped this from The Onion  That one was especially satisfying, because I really do think Donald Trump is an overrated asshole. It must take an awful lot of skill to turn a $50 million inheritance into a debtload of billions. I just wanna know why it's considered stupid for college kids to use the same financial approach - oh yeah, they're using their credit cards to buy pizza. Good ol' Don's buying casinos with his (and apparently missing those monthly minimum payments to boot...) Dumbass. Hope you at least used your Discover card to get that 1% rebate back... And the funniest thing I've read in a while... Zug - Prank Call To the Mall. Unfortunately, there was no image to swipe, but the article linked is worth your time. |December 4 - Just for fun. But for some reason, I opened a few additional emails today. Boy am I glad I did. Here's a sample of the brilliance I endure:
Pretty funny, huh? I've yet to reply. Honestly, I've got better things to do. But as a service to my readers, I'm gonna let YOU decide what my snappy retort should be. Here are the first few that came to mind:
Which one should I send back? Or, if you think you can come up with a better one, I've conveniently forgotten to edit out the email address of the tool who took the time to write in. Happy e-mail bombing! |December 1 - If you're in Sacramento... If you're not in Sacramento, you'll just have to put up with me for the time being... I admit it - I watched Jeopardy last night to see if the nerdy Mormon guy really lost. He did. Of course, I'm guessing he'd have lost a lot sooner if the categories would have been Parts Of the Female Body or Cool Things To Do in Las Vegas. Just kidding... Actually, I got a kick out of him. Hope he'll turn up on Wheel of Fortune next week. First report on my online "businesses"... Looks like most of them are attempts to get me to buy mailing lists and mass-spam everyone. I'm not really into that. Plus, getting loads of people to pay for something once I've gotten their attention doesn't really seem to be my strength. Hell, I've had well over 2 million hits since I've been running this site, and currently average 3000+ a day (check this year's stats for yourself, even though I'll bet most of them are people swiping images...) and I've still only sold a handful of t shirts! If I took this site seriously, I'd have fired myself a long time ago. Either that, or made a ton of venture capital when money-losing websites were all the rage... But I'll tell you what - listen to Famous James radio and tell your friends about it and we'll call it even... | |
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